Hiya, My name is Abby Kedwell, I am approaching the ripe old age of 30 in February and we have just recently been blessed with the FANTASTIC news that we are having our first child – due in May.
The thing is I am not very good with writing about myself! I tend to waffle or become distracted with something I have said and very rapidly digress. My apologise for waffling in advance and if I do digress I will at some point on the journey get back to my point! Oh and one last thing I can’t spell to save my life, fantastic for someone who wants a career in writing!
Unfortunately my life started in tragedy, my mother was killed by a reckless driver when I was just 3, I won’t go into too much detail but as you can imagine this was a trying time for both me and my beloved family. We managed to muster through with the help of a great family unit and the selfless help of my Nan and Granddad. These two adorable people were and continue to be, my rocks. Although you can’t replace a mother’s love, they gave it a good old go.
With the trauma of losing my mum I became troubled and then begun the crippling anxiety, panic attacks and stress. These episodes manifested themselves in ways that’s unimaginable to someone so young and they truly took over my life. Battling through I managed to distract myself with writing. Writing was the only reason I got out of bed. I found school increasingly difficult, unless I was being creative I shut down and I was bullied non-stop! Children can be so cruel. Again I held my head high and mustered through, pen in hand and a dream that took me to wonderful places.
When I finally started working I found that I got bored easily and it became harder and harder to keep down jobs. Now this you may read and think “lazy cow” but it was more than being lazy. As in school, if I wasn’t being creative in my job role I would shut down and become depressed. I would constantly think of fantastic business ideas and elaborate escape plans. There was nothing worse than working in mundane roles and slogging away at a job I hated for next to nothing in return. It wasn’t even the money – I needed a purpose.
Still jumping from job to job I finally found my partner, he is a huge part of my life, a ten year part to be exact but as they say some things are better left to the imagination. We have been through so much it would take a few years to write it all down. But we re very much in love and I want to grow old with him - my soul mate till the very end!
Fast forward a few years to when I lost my beloved Granddad to the dreaded “C” word, Cancer! He sadly passed way on the anniversary of my mother’s death, 13th September. Again this is another part of my life that would take decades to write and this is still very raw for me. It may have been over 4 years ago but I miss my granddad so very much it hurts like mad. He would be so proud of where we have got to today and the beautiful little bundle that is growing in my belly.
Which brings me swiftly to the present day – after a very turbulent life of ups down and what ifs I am finally here! I have a purpose at last. I still struggle with the mundane slog of work but I know in my heart of hearts that I am destined for great things. A purpose comes in many forms – being a mum has brought me full circle from losing my mum. To give my child the mother’s love that I didn’t receive will make my life worthwhile, something that I have been wanting for so many years. Also in a strange way having this blog is a purpose, if someone can take one thing from this blog and use it within their lives, I have served my purpose.
